华诤回到家时,家人都睡了。第二天起得晚,下楼吃早餐时,父母亲和姑姑都出去买东西了,只见表姐Cindy穿着牛仔裤和T-shirt,光着脚丫子,一只腿踩缩在椅子上,正对着餐桌坐着吃东西呢。
“Hey, Matty, finally get up,Ah?”
比华诤大一岁的表姐Cindy岳思思是ABC,也就是传说中的“香蕉人”。她短发烫得卷卷地贴着头皮,瘦瘦的,皮肤故意晒得比较黑,眼睛很大。这种外貌在美国可是很吃得开的——美国人以为,东方女孩就应该长得又黑又立体才叫有神韵。
她打的招呼让华诤不好意思地抓抓头发。宋云贞正从院里进来,关上门,回身对华诤道:
“哟,大宝贝儿,起了?”
站在华母旁的菲佣,用生硬的中文道:
“少爷吃什么早餐?”
“随便”
华母道:
“那和姐姐一样吃牛奶面包?”
“好,谢谢奶奶”
华母接过菲佣手里的餐盘,边把早餐放在餐桌上边道:
“昨天怎么这么晚才回来?”
“Granny, He definitely had so st night.”
Cindy的脸对着外祖母解释,眼睛却是看着华诤挤眉弄眼。华诤有点怀疑自己的英文水平:
“I didn’t have anything st night. I ca back and I went straight to sleep.”
Cindy十指张开,双掌在耳朵两边朝外举:
“ Eww~Liar! Whatever you say . Hey, Whatever you say!”
华诤觉得自己肯定跟表姐有什么误会,拉开椅子坐在她对面:
“I’ not lying. I don’t have to.OK?FYI, what do you an when you said I had so? Had so what?”
“SEX! Of course!”
华诤一口牛奶喷在餐桌上。
Cindy笑着接道:
“What do you think I an?”
华母忙过来给他拍着背:
“怎么了?宝贝,慢点喝!吃饭不要说话嘛。”
华诤边抽张纸捂嘴咳嗽,边朝祖母摆摆手、示意她不用帮忙。华母便拿了抹布来擦桌子:
“你们姐弟俩说什么呢?”
华诤忙道:
“没什么,没什么。”
“It’s OK to have sex,Matty, you don’t have to lie. I get it——You are a grown-up, you are in a rtionship,you have sex.That’s what people do. Hey, I bet your girlfriend st be really aweso to keep you that long. ”
华诤连连朝表姐摇手:
“We didn’t have sex. We’ve never had sex.”
“Whaaaat?!”
Cindy看华诤的眼神,让华诤觉得自己就像来自侏罗纪世界的恐龙。
“You serious? ”
“Yeah. Why would I lie sothing about that?”
华诤顿了顿,既然表姐这么光明磊落,他也不想做个萎缩怕事的人,便露出一个无奈的苦笑,坦白道:
“Although I really want to. To be honest , It’s killing ! You know ,the whole NO SEX thing.”
“So you are hot?”
“What do you expect? I’ve never had sex in entire life. Look at , Sis.! I’ always hot! OK? However, girlfriend, she’s too shy. I don’t want to scare her off.”
Cindy深感自己和这个表弟在文化上的差异鸿沟深深,两人根本鸡同鸭讲:
“Hey ,Matty, Sweety, look, you gotta have sex with your girlfriend, you gotta have WILD sex with your girlfriend——that’s what boyfriends do.That’s what would keep your girlfriend closer. I can ensure you that you are not the only one who’s hot. Won have needs.”